Thin is in...

This post is purely in response to one by a Bloggerville neighbour, one called Nikita. (It is strongly suggested that you read her post before reading this one, to get the context right.) The views and opinions expressed are of the writer alone, though he will not be responsible for any kind of trauma caused.

Dear Nikita

I found your post extremely offensive and demeaning to people like me, who (try to) live on the other end of the spectrum. To convey my anger, I am replying point-by-point to you.

1. It isn’t fun when you go shopping and come back empty handed because eleven out of the ten outfits you thought of trying looked like you were wearing traditional tribal dresses worn in Andaman. It is worse when you shopping companion meaningfully glances at the tent house next door, hoping you take the hint. And even worse, when you actually take the hint, but don't like the colour of any 'outfit'.

2. Ditto!

3. When people ask how much you weigh, they expect the answer to be in ‘quintals', and not ‘kilos’. It makes you wish the metabolic process existed (and worked).

4. It is assumed that you are the reason why people (like Nikita) survive on air.

5. Everything, from falling sick to failing an exam is attributed to your weight. Period. There is no other problem that plagues your life besides the excess of a few kilos.

6. When travelling in an overcrowded auto with friends, you are always the one to seat someone on your lap. Once you learn to give someone your seat, people standing just ahead of you stare at you fearfully, as if you'll crush them like a juggernaut if the driver brakes.

7. No comments on this one... YOU WIN!

8. No comments on this one either... DRAW!

9. The word 'starvation' (of others) is considered synonymous with your name.

10. If someone ignores you, they think it’s a perfectly valid excuse to say they just didn’t see you, and must be suffering from weakening eyesight. Innovative. Ha!

11. It is as embarrassing to weigh yourself in front of someone as it would’ve been if you were underweight. Probably more...

12. People in the Metro quite sincerely believe that three of them would've fit in the space that you are occupying, and continue to give you baleful glares till you give up your seat or get off. The former is worse, because they then discover that three of them plus a Nikita-esque person can fit into the space vacated. :|

To add to that, my frame, if you can call it that has spurred on the jokers in the pack of 'friends' that I have.
Sample conversation:
Me: That didn't appeal to my funny side.
'Friend' - You have a spherical shape - and a sphere has no sides... haha....

In this case also, the 'Friend' survived because the 'conversation' happened over chat and not in person.

Still, Ms. Nikita, I appreciate you airing of you concerns, and believe they cannot be taken lightly. (no pun intended)

Hoping for a prompt response.

Sauron